Tuesday, April 24, 2007
A Series of Unfortunate Events?
seems like i am goin thru a series of unfortunate events..... lousy things keep comin one after another?!?!?!?! and i am sooo darn drained physically and still gotta be bogged by stupid things mentally... arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... i am soooooo tired.......~!!!! neway i am still happy abt doin e things i am doin lar.... =____= juz tired and fedup of certain things as well...
almost got 1 more godma today... she say if i call her godma, nxt time i got problems or wat she sure settle for me and "diao zui" for me.... she ask me wan anot... =_____________= i told her lidat i will have alot ganma liaoz... =_____= i already got 1 since toddler.... got 2 young 'mama' n mummie liaoz... plus 1 more ganma... *FAINT* lorzzzzzzzzzzzz... hmmm.. budden hor.. if seriously i got prob, i tink she sure can diao zui one... i got no doubts abt dat.. she no diao she can ask her daughter diao also... =X bah~`
oh wellz, enuf abt dat... my double layered orbakak is becomin a whole... yeah... its nt becomin 1 layered.. but its swellin up becomin 1 bIG orbAkak~~~! great aint it?!?!!? =______=
now i got puffy black orbakaks.... *faint* i am almost drained dryyyyyyyyy~~~~ bo battery liaozzzzz.... hopefully can slp early tonite n replenish some of my energy... duh~~ i am gonna have long dayz ahead... with alot of work from now till the World Book Fair.... and 2nd week of may got chalet... =_= gotta rush to work n to tq n to chalet n to service n to chalet and then home again and the nxt day gotta work!!!!!!! HMMM.... do i seem to be killin myself? its slow suicide ba...? can barely keep my eyes fully opened... =_______________=
Jie crapped at 9:13 PM
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Saturday, April 14, 2007
Super Foul Mood...
so much for been able to keep up till now... i've gotten myself sick again... upset and agitated... for the things i've heard in sometime in e past... and for the things i've heard today....
can i say i am really tired n upset? nobody understands why i play games... why i like gadgets... why sometimes i really dun wish to talk abt anything... sometimes the words that u say, really hurts like hell man... they dun seem to be simple alphabets anymore but thorns piercin thru ur heart.... there are many reasons why i play games.. sometimes its to chat with frenz and kill boredom at e same time but sometimes its juz to vent out my frustrations.... be it anger or things dat made me upset... ventin it out seems to make me feel more at peace n calm....
giving is better than receiving.... izzit all really so true all the time? most of e time i feel dat way... but sometimes when u get hurt by all those ppl whom u've always cared abt and placed them above urself... it really makes u ponder if all those things u've done are really worthwhile anot.. all e things, be it big or small... i find it soooo damn hard to swallow e feelings man... its juz makes me wanna juz bochap everything and juz do wateva i like.... and not care abt wat anyone else thinks.. most of the time i've never bothered abt being on e lugi side.. being e person who pay n do things for ppl and they juz 4get abt everything... monetary things has never been wat i calculate among ppl... time was never wat i would keep for myself and do things i wan to do.... but when u get hurt in e end.... it can be so tormenting at times.... hAIZ....
i am not referin to a specific thing that happened or wateva.. but its juz a string of thoughts that came by my sicked n drained mind...... yes i am still aware of wat i am sayin.. and yes all these thoughts are triggered by events..... i dun have e mind to sleep now even tho physically i am thoroughly drained... it's been a busy week and i muz say my weekend is worse so far... wat comes tomorrow i dunch know..... will it be better or worse i dunch know... but wateva it is... i dun really have e mood to care abt anyone or anythg... not even myself... dats e way i am feelin now......
Jie crapped at 9:39 PM
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Tuesday, April 10, 2007
GANBATTENE~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hmmm.... at tjpg nowz..... workin part time... work liao gonna use e money to get a digital cam and a new handphone ba??? ROFL... not so soon larz.. since my handphone not spoilt yet... its juz cranky like me.... oh wellz.... usually when i say i wanna get things, i usually get it only at least half year later.... why??? coz i spend e time lookin n searchin for e things dat i like...
it should be a good point ba?
neway polly juz cut her hair and she seemed really upset... i guess nothing i say would ever help cheer her abit? but it makes me sad seein her lidat... i saw her hair larz... it wasnt really clear from e webcam...
i guess hair sometimes means alot to people ba... well.. not dat i dun care.... but i get over things quite fast ba... maybe i'm abit different.. oh well... neway... time passes very fast and very soon ur hair will be long again..............~! dun be sad..... it makes me sad seein u sad........
=( =( =(
gotta get back to work le.. i am glad i seemed to be very energetic dis 2 days despite e fact dat my nose is startin to get itchy and i kinda sneeze n cough occasionally durin e past few days.... bleahhh... i din catch e virus for 3 weeks and i am NOT gonna lose e battle now~~~!!!!!! bah~
Jie crapped at 10:15 PM
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Tuesday, April 03, 2007
bAh~~~!!!! sOme tHgs n thAnkS too!
i haven been slpin much since last week from my trip and i muz admit that i shd be sleepin now but i came here coz of some things i saw and some thgs dat occured... neway haiz.. i am really tired.... i dun mean now.. but juz tired of certain things.... not dat probing will help... it doesnt really help when u're really sick of somethg.... esp when more than one person probes at e same time.. no.... u're not makin it nicer nor makin it seem like u care.. no it aint... to me, it feels like u're juz forcin me to a corner... it does not work dis way... humans do not react nicely to such confrontations... i'm nt sayin u dun care... but it juz doesnt feel really nice dis way lorz...
to e someone whom i've always felt comfortable with, when i'm down.....i appreciated it when u listen... gave me advice and try to understand from my point of view... and respect my decisions when i do some things... not now.. not once... but in everythg i do... appreciate e times u listened when i'm down... the company u've given me when i'm in e dumps.... and i do really need those at times even tho u may not be ard everytime.... u dun have to say things to make someone feel better... juz the existence and presence helps alot yea.... well.. there are still ppl who dun understand the true meaning of presences.... or mayb 存在 sounds better ba? sometimes when i tell dis to ppl..., they find it funny... well, mayb i do tink in a different way but i really feel dat its a kinda feelin dat cannot be describe with words... its not wat u say dat matters but ur 存在 is in fact the main reason why ppl feel soothed when they're down or upset... sometimes... juz e presence or existence of somethg is enuf to lighten someones mood.. not sure if anyone understands dis kinda feelin but to me its kinda beyond words describable. =P THANKSSS.....
well... "glad to be able to lighten up ya mood a lil..." some quote some where somebody.. =P
oh well... i'm juz sick of certain things rite now... and its not like avoidin will help.... i understand... everybody knows the model answer to everything... thats how i feel.. i do know the model answers.. i do know what I SHOULD do... but am i suppose to do things to please PPL or whom shall i please? everybody knows e answer on wat should or should not do.... but however aint e reason behind the actions are more impt? i do admit sometimes i say things that are really bad... and somebody said to me... 你变坏了。nah.. it aint dat way... its not dat... its juz dat i dun wanna do things juz simply coz ppl bug me to do it... u can bug me to do things... to say things... but do u wan me to fake em out? i can talk crap say lame things to entertain u... but honestly sayin, who wanna take dis kinda rubbish manz...
bleahZ~ feelin really tired dis few days.. almost fell twice today.. dunno if i'm gettin flu or if my old fren, mr migraine is showin up soon.... wateva it is.. i hope i can dong over all dis crap.. much as i hate being sick.... i hate it to drag over weeks and accumulate..... wateva crap dis is... either u come or u juz scram... dun make my days miserable... its such agony havin to battle with all dis kinda gonna sick feelin and everyday feels like ur battery is drained and leakin away... well.. its been long since i had dis kinda headachy feelin where my eyelid thumps and twitches inside... arghhh.... it makes me all pissed havin to tink abt it... if i feel drained e nxt few days, den my old fren is comin for a visit ler... i shd be like a zombie for e comin week... may god bless u dat i will not flare at u coz i am really grouchy and irritable when i have dis kinda feelin... or mayb i shd juz keep myself away from ppl.... =_="
Jie crapped at 12:18 AM
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